Battlestar Galactica: Blood on the Scales

A singularly joyless episode warrants a singularly joyless recap. Let’s just get this over with. Adama and Tigh are captured by the mutineers, including Captain Kelly, whom we haven’t seen since his arrest for sabotage last season. Gaeta orders Hot Dog and Narcho to shoot down the Raptor on which Roslin and Baltar are escaping, but Hot Dog hesitates. The Raptor safely reaches the Cylon basestar, where Roslin talks the Cylons -- the Sixes, Twos, and Eights, plus Tory -- out of jumping away from the Galactica. The basestar hides itself among the ships in the fleet.

Gaeta and Zarek want Adama court-martialed, with a reluctant Romo Lampkin heading up his defense. Zarek, meanwhile, secretly murders the entire Quorum, which appalls Gaeta.

Starbuck and Apollo skulk around the Galactica, hurling grenades and shooting people. They spring Helo, Athena, Hera, Tigh, Caprica, and Anders from the brig, but Anders is shot in the neck in the process. Much chaos ensues. Starbuck remains behind with her injured husband while Apollo and the rest try to rescue Adama.

Off in his own isolated subplot, Tyrol becomes all awesome and Die Hard by crawling through an endless numbers of tunnels and vents throughout the Galactica. Eventually, he’s caught climbing into the munitions locker by Kelly. Kelly reminisces about old times and how Cally was a total slut, then lets Tyrol escape.

Gaeta orders Narcho to prepare a firing squad and take Adama down to the launch tube. According to writer Jane Espenson on the webisode commentary, the original plan was to reveal Narcho instead of Hoshi as Gaeta’s lover, which, just based on their interaction this episode, would have actually made more sense; the Gaeta/Hoshi romance in the webisodes seemed a little -- what’s the word? -- random. Also, Narcho is much hotter than Hoshi, so there’s that. By the way, Battlestar Galactica, don’t think it’s passed unnoticed that this is the second time you’ve revealed a gay character to be crazy and evil (hi, Admiral Cain!). It’s the sort of thing you really can get away with only once over the course of a series, if that.

Meanwhile, back on the basestar, Baltar snogs a random brunette Six and feels guilty for deserting his cult (his “fan club,” as he calls them without discernable irony. I heart Baltar. Even in the pit of despair, he brings the funny).

Kelly, who is with the firing squad, breaks down into tears and joins up with Apollo and the gang, who overthrow the mutineers in the launch tube and rescue Adama.

Gaeta orders the fleet to jump away from the Cylon basestar, but Tyrol mucks around in the bowels of the ship and disables the FTL drive. Stranded, Gaeta finally comes to his senses and stands down, just as Adama storms the CIC. Gaeta and Zarek are taken into custody.

In the brig, Gaeta shares a cigarette with Baltar and rambles insanely about how he originally wanted to be an architect and design buildings shaped like food. When Baltar tries to offer some comfort, Gaeta cuts him off and tells him he’s okay with the way things turned out.

Zarek and Gaeta are taken in front of a firing squad. As Adama gives the command to fire, Gaeta looks at the stump of his amputated leg and realizes that, for the first time, it’s stopped hurting.

There's still, what, six episodes left until the end of the series, but I'm out of it. Not to get all melodramatic or anything, but the season thus far has been nasty and spiteful, and I'm simply not enjoying it. I despise the characters, with the possible exception of cheery scuzzball Baltar, and, with Gaeta's death, I have zero emotional investment remaining in anyone. Watching this season has been a bit of an ordeal, and life is short.