Fun with keywords (desperation edition)

The original plan was to post the second installment of my grand Heroes Experiment today. That turned out to be overly optimistic, as I lacked the necessary enthusiasm and gumption over the weekend to push through and finish the blasted thing. So there will be a delay.

Sort of in a funk these days, actually. In the interest of mood-boosting, I would be greatly obliged if anyone could point me in the direction of any of the following:

a) a job,
b) cool inside scoop on Volume Five of Heroes (feel free to just make crap up -- I'm not particular),
c) cheeky nude photos of Sendhil Ramamurthy (once again, fake is totally okay).

Thanks muchly in advance.

I know I did this just last month, but in the interests of padding this post out to a respectable length, here's a look at more search terms people have used to find this site:

why bother with heroes volume 5
Good question. I've been asking myself that as well these days. I guess it's because Heroes, warts and all, still has a great deal of potential to turn into something really cool and enduring. Most importantly, it features an attractive and likeable cast, all of whom are worth watching despite all the nonsense the show puts them through.

must they always be the apocalypse heroes
apocalypse heroes always

It's getting a little old, isn't it? To be fair, Volume Four didn't really feature the threat of an apocalypse. Oh, sure, Matt slapped together a precognitive painting about blowing up the Capitol, but that plotline sputtered out pretty quickly and was never mentioned again. But Volumes One through Three were fair teeming with narrowly averted apocalypses: Peter blew up New York! Everyone died from the Shanti virus! Sylar blew up Costa Verde! Someone blew up Tokyo for some reason or other! Enough already!

what episode did shaun cassidy sing in on the hardy boys
A whole bunch of episodes, actually. Shaun shakes his feathered hair and wiggles his bellbottom-clad hips and warbles his little heart out in "The Mystery of the Flying Courier," "Wipe Out," "The Hardy Boys & Nancy Drew Meet Dracula," and "Oh Say Can You Sing." Probably others as well.

max headroom anderson cooper
I get this one a lot. It confused me deeply, until I figured people might very well be confusing cool, WASPy cable news anchor Anderson Cooper with cool, WASPy investigative reporter Edison Carter (played by Matt Frewer) in the awesome and iconic 1986 ABC series Max Headroom. Similar, yet not the same.

is there male nudity in sex lives of potato men
I'm going to turn this one over to Lou, frequent PotA commenter and our resident expert on all things regarding Sex Lives of the Potato Men. Care to weigh in, Lou?

heroes show who pushed petrelli out the window
Depends upon which Petrelli you're talking about. Danko pushed Nathan Petrelli out a window, whereas Sylar defenestrated Peter Petrelli. And Claude tossed Peter off a rooftop.

famima difficulty in the usa
I haven't heard anything specific, but the Famima!! in West Hollywood recently closed, which seems like an ominous sign. If true, it'd be a shame -- I dearly love Famima!! (I'm not being overly excited -- the double exclamation points are officially part of the name). If you're lucky enough to have a Famima!! in your neighborhood, pop in for some steamed pork buns or an excellent chocolate banana parfait, just to boost their business a little.

buy heroes mohinder's map
buy sylar's watch
buy claire's sweater 1961

These are all excellent merchandising opportunities just waiting to happen. Instead, NBC keeps trying to interest people in buying helix necklaces and action figures (wait -- you can buy the Linderman action figure with either a live or dead flower? Is that right? And can anyone tell any difference between the Niki figure and the Jessica figure?).

among other highlights, this episode features joe, clad only in soaking wet white shorts, crawling on hands and knees through the surf, valiantly rescuing frank from about four inches of water; this should be a cheap thrill, but i found myself wishing shaun's mom had been on the set to tell him to put some clothes on. frank's innate mistrust of women asserts itself here when he somehow gets it into his pretty head that their girlfriends are conspiring with the gang of thieves, despite precious little evidence to support this.
Er... yes. You found the right site.

sendhil ramamurthy is skulky the turtle wonder
skulky the turtle wonder is he into breasts
hot mohinder turtle action

Boy-Morgan, my friend, are you having quite enough fun with my keywords?


Morgan Dodge said…
Groovy that I actually have time to read this post and comment, and just in the nick of time! I need to defend my honor!

What does "the nick of time" mean anyway? Who is nick and why does he always have to cut it so close? But I digress...

I promise you on my still living mother's grave that I had nothing to do with those search terms for Skulky. How the hell did that happen?

I'm actually not sure if Skulky is a breat turtle, or a leg turtle. It's hard to say. I think he likes to play it close to the shell.

Maybe someone else is having fun, but I'm pretty sure I'd recall having the time to have that much fun. I'm sorta disappointed in myself for not coming up with something new for your search terms, actually. Sorry!
Morgan Richter said…
Boy-Morgan, I have maligned you. Looks like both "sendhil ramamurthy is skulky the turtle wonder" and "skulky the turtle wonder is he into breasts" came from a Googler in Sydney (hi, Dan!), whereas "hot mohinder turtle action" was Googled by individuals in both London and Poplar, England. Self-amusing UK lurkers, I welcome you.
Dan said…
hi, Dan!

Well, y'know. If I'm going to type in the 35 (?) characters in to go visit your site, I figured I might as well type in a similar number of characters that might keep your keywords interesting and Skulkified! (Bookmarks? What do you mean, bookmarks??)


Can't help with a job or nude Mohinder, but lies (uh, I mean scoops) about Heroes Chapter Five may well follow after I return from lunch.
Morgan Richter said…
Really, at this point, I'd love to hear some lies about the next season of Heroes. Wild, exuberant, convoluted, interesting lies.

Time-saving shortcut: you can also just type in (minus the "blogspot" part) and it should bring you right to this site. Except when it doesn't! But usually it does. Googling "morgan richter" (with or without quotes) and hitting the trusty "I'm Feeling Lucky" button should do it too.

(Huh. Just did a vanity Google to make sure nothing wonky comes up, and this was the tenth search result: "Know much about Morgan Richter? We do! Read a full biography at!" So I clicked. Here is my full biography: "Morgan Richter worked in Production on TV shows such as America's Funniest Home Videos: A Tribute to Moms, America's Funniest Home Videos: Stupid Cupid, and Talk Soup Down Under." Oh. That was a little sad, actually. I'm starting to suspect Fancast doesn't know much about me at all.)
Morgan Dodge said…
I expect that sort of self-entertaining linkage from Australidan, but et tu UK?

You're lucky, girl-Morgan. A google search of my name appears to imply that I'm nothing more than a auto dealership. I have nothing to do with Jeep, I promise you.
It also looks like my Twitter has moved into the top ten, which is nice. As well as a Facebook link that is... not me.

So Dan... Is Skulky a breast turtle, or a leg turtle? Do tell!
Morgan Richter said…
Maybe you should open a dealership, Boy-Morgan. You could call it Morgan Dodge Dodge.

The first Facebook link that comes up under my name is for some other, more popular Morgan Richter. Vanity Googles are not an unmixed blessing. (During that blasted Amazon novel competition, my Google results were awesome! There was a listing for me at the New York Times! Those days, sadly, are gone.)
Ingrid Richter said…
Hmm, not really sure why a Google Image search for cheeky nude photos of Sendhil Ramamurthy turns up a picture of Homer Simpson. Greater minds than mine might be able to figure this out...

Love your keyword posts, Morgan! Glad to see the Hardy Boys creeping in among the results.
Morgan Richter said…
I mean, it's not as though nude photos of Sendhil don't exist online. Sendhil_Daily, which is one of those sites that make the world a somewhat cheerier place just through its existence, has some rather nice screencaps of the lad in various stages of undress from some turrible-looking filmed-in-Bulgaria action thriller he made in 2001 with, ahem, Richard Grieco (aw, Grieco. Fond memories of Booker...). And yes, I have already eBayed my copy of the not-available-in-the-US DVD. Hans from the Netherlands assures me it's in the mail. Oh, sure, it'll be wretched, but... Naked Sendhil!
Dan said…
All rightey then. You want to know what might be in the next volume of Heroes?

Try this:
Morgan Richter said…
Gor Blimey, Dan, that's effing brilliant! Everyone, go to Dan's site and give his Make Your Own Heroes thingymajig a whirl. It's awesome good fun.

Not sure anyone's ever told you this before, Dan, but you're kind of funny.
Dan said…
Not sure anyone's ever told you this before, Dan, but you're kind of funny.

Thanks. Filled in a couple of hours if nothing else.

I was going to make a button that, at the end, transformed the whole thing into a neatly formatted summary, ripe for copying and pasting.

But some days one just can't face Javascript.

Today is such a day.
Morgan Dodge said…
Dan, I would like to applaud your foray into high-tech mad-libs. Brilliant!
While I'm not sure I believe that Parkman would ever fall in love with Skulky, I'm sure it would have happened eventually anyway.

Well done! I doff my cap to you, good sir. (Did you ever consider doing one of these for Smallville or Lost? Please?)
Dan said…
Well done! I doff my cap to you, good sir. (Did you ever consider doing one of these for Smallville or Lost? Please?)

Thanks, Boy-Morgan. I've done a few of these for Australian TV shows for Australian MAD magazine. Because of my, y'know, Australian-ness.

I could probably whip one up for Smallville without too much hassle. Lost might be trickier - if there's a pattern to their seasons I haven't quite discerned it yet.

I'll let you know if I come up with something.

But not today. Today I'm sick... Poor Dan :(
Morgan Richter said…
Get well, Dan! When you break out the little frowny-face emoticon, I know it must be serious. I remember you mentioning once that Australia doesn't have TheraFlu (or squirrels), which right now seems unspeakably sad.

My copy of the Sendhil-Grieco extravaganza arrived safe from the Netherlands yesterday. It's hooty. My review should be up later today, ambition pending.
Patrick said…
I'm afraid now when I'm googling for the site that I'll leave some incriminating evidence about myself. After all, the Irish address must stand out. I take no responsibility for any of it and insist that you must have an enormous Irish following which is also interested in turtle action or whatever is being searched for.

Dan's make your own episode game was hilarious. Genius. For some reason it started me thinking about Claire getting that job at the comic book store and how that really didn't last very long.

Can't wait for episode 2 of our new season. I'm surprised that Morgan isn't writing for a TV show over there - surely that spec script would open doors at a number of studios? Or is it very tough to get into these things?

I wouldn't give up though. The writing is top quality.
Morgan Richter said…
No worries, Patrick. You (or someone else from my vast readership in Dublin) tend to Google non-incriminatory phrases like "Heroes Preppies" to find this site.

Thanks for the words of encouragement about my writing, Patrick. It's a frustrating process, trying to sell a script or get hired as a writer. Nothing to be done but keep hanging in there.
Morgan Richter said…
And now I'm getting cool secret messages in my search terms. Yes, Patrick, you can manipulate the keywords.

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