Friday, December 31, 2010

Fun With Keywords: Fake Nude Andrew McCarthy Edition

Happy New Year, everyone. Let’s close out 2010 with another look at the search terms visitors used to find this site in recent weeks.

andrew mccarthy fake nude
For some reason, the idea of someone diligently hunting online for doctored Andrew McCarthy nude photos delights me to no end.

is helen hunt in pretty in pink
No, but it does seem like the kind of movie she’d crop up in, doesn’t it? Both Gina Gershon and Kristy Swanson have small parts in Pretty in Pink, however, and that’s got to count for something.

psych mocks the mentalist
At every possible turn.

"criminal minds""25 to life""hotch"
25 to life criminal minds no hotch
25 to life where was hotch
Glad to see I’m not the only one who was concerned and/or miffed about that. According to internet scuttlebutt, there was no Hotch in “25 to Life” because Thomas Gibson was off playing in a golf tournament in Wales during filming. I have no idea whether this is true. I do know, however, that “I was playing golf in Wales” is my new go-to excuse for skipping work.

an artist, finds an old canoe in woods behind her property. her neighbors consider it abandoned. elle cleans it, paints scenes on it depicting native american rituals, and displays it in her art gallery. flo, the canoe's original owner, claims it, but a court grants elle title.
elle, an artist, finds an old canoe in woods behind her property. her neighbors consider it abandoned. elle cleans it, paints scenes on it depicting native american rituals, and displays it in her art gallery. flo, the canoe's original owner, claims it, but a court grants elle title. this is
canoe's original owner, claims it, but a court grants elle title
Lord. I don’t… I can’t… Why does this search keep coming up? What’s this all about? I’ve had people from Indiana, Arizona, South Dakota, Texas and California find this site by searching for this. Someone, please, drop me a note in the comments and explain.

charlie hobbitt
I’m pretty sure Dominic Monaghan answers to “Charlie Hobbit.” It’s easier that way.

who plays raj on psych's bollywood
I’ve answered this one before, but it’s included again because it’s been a couple months since I’ve mentioned Sendhil Ramamurthy on this site, and that seems like a crying shame.

who played gus's wife in the polarizing express
Little Rudy Huxtable, who grew up to become a knockout.

what season charles beauchamp criminal minds
criminal minds episodes on charles beauchamp
None. Charles Beauchamp is Agent Seaver’s serial-killing father, but he’s never been seen on the show. Hotch and Rossi -- remember, Rossi was a member of the BAU years ago before retiring and then rejoining the team after Gideon left -- arrested him when Seaver was a child, which would have been maybe fifteen years ago.

criminal minds best morgan episodes
Let’s see…. Well, “Profiler, Profiled” is pretty much all Morgan, all the time, so that’s cool. My favorite Morgan moment might be the savoir-faire he showed in dealing with the pack of buttheady, white power-sympathizing, FBI-hating militia members in “Identity.” (I also loved Rossi’s decision to send Morgan to deal with them in the first place. Rossi is a world-class troublemaker). He gets some quality screen time in “Lucky” and “Penelope,” too. There are a handful of other Morgan-heavy episodes -- “25 to Life,” “Hopeless,” “Brothers in Arms” -- but I wouldn’t consider any of them standouts.

criminal minds reflection of desire horrible
Yes. Awful. Ghastly. Pretentious. Embarrassing for all concerned.

what happened to criminal minds writers now hackneyed
“Hackneyed” is exactly the right word. Thank you. I don’t know what’s going on, but the same staff writers who’ve turned out strong episodes in seasons past are now churning up crap. “25 to Life” and “Reflections of Desire” are both poorly written by any reasonable standard… and they’re both credited to writers/producers who’ve also been responsible for very good episodes. Good writers usually don’t suddenly turn bad, so something wonky is happening behind the scenes. I’ve read that showrunner Edward Bernero has left the show in the hands of other staff members while he focuses his energies on the upcoming spin-off. Maybe that has something to do with the dip in quality, maybe not.

did not get psych twin peaks dancing ending
Judging by my keyword statistics after that episode aired, you’re not alone. The ending was an homage to a number of Twin Peaks’ most baffling moments. If you were a regular Twin Peaks viewer, you’d get it; if not, you wouldn’t. I attempted to parse a bunch of the references in the comment thread following my recap of that episode, but it’s almost beyond explanation.

garcia as communication liason?
Pretty dumb idea, huh? Garcia is without peer as a technical analyst, but she’s no damn good at filling J.J.’s shoes as the public face of the BAU. Nor should she be. It makes no sense that she’d try to fit into that role after J.J.’s departure. It’s one of several creative missteps the show has made this season.

thomas gibson shirtless
I’m feeling especially service-y today, so here you go. This is from Love and Human Remains. If the center-parted bangs don’t tip you off that this was filmed in the early Nineties, those extra-long high-waisted boxer-briefs certainly will.

reid kidnapped turns in hotch
Heh. I’m presuming this refers to the awesome scene in “Revelations” in which villain du jour James Van Der Beek holds a kidnapped Reid at gunpoint and, while the rest of the team watches on live webcam, threatens to kill him unless he picks one of his teammates to die in his place. Reid picks Hotch, and awesomeness ensues. The clip’s on YouTube, starting around the three-minute mark.

love honour and obey johnny lee miller karaoke song
Avenues & Alleyways.” It’s pretty great. It’s hard to find, but if you can, track down the whole soundtrack, which, as an added bonus, also features Jude Law singing “Rock On.”

lost cast member double rows eyelashes
That could only be Nestor Carbonnell.

jennifer jarreau sexy
Hmm. Not sure. J.J. is beautiful, obviously, but she looks too much like an adorable woodland creature to be sexy. It'd be like lusting after Bambi.

criminal minds jj weak character
I’d disagree with this. For all its flaws, Criminal Minds doesn’t get enough credit for its strong development of the series regulars, J.J. included. She didn’t always have much to do, but up until she left the show, J.J. was consistently kick-ass. We saw only a glimpse of her background (she escaped from her stifling hometown on a soccer scholarship, and she had an older sister who committed suicide), and we discovered only bits about her personal life (her interests included: a) butterflies, and b) guys with improbable Cajun accents), but we learned plenty about J.J. just by watching her do her job. Check her out in “The Big Game,” in which she cheerfully trounces a bunch of random guys at darts, then sweetly manipulates the local cops into letting her look through their files, then grimly faces down a pack of rabid dogs who’d just torn another woman to pieces. Nobody would ever consider “The Big Game” a J.J.-centric episode, but doesn’t seeing the way she reacts to these situations tell you a lot about her character?

sylar character traits
personality anaylsis peter petrelli
In terms of character development, Heroes is the flip side of the coin from Criminal Minds. Viewers received a glut of backstory and personal information about both Sylar and Peter… but much of it was nonsensical and contradictory, and it ultimately weakened both characters. Along with most of the other major characters on Heroes, neither Peter nor Sylar behave in a consistent manner from episode to episode. Thus, they’re impossible to analyze, because their actions don’t. make. sense.

Merry 2011, everyone. Please make it a good one.

4 comments:

Ingrid Richter said...

Can I just say how much I love your keyword posts, Morgan? Happy New Year!

Morgan Richter said...

Happy New Year right back at you, sister of mine.

Kind of quiet around here these days. Mid-January, Criminal Minds picks back up, and I'll be adding White Collar once again as well. NBC's The Cape kicks off soon, and it looks promising... but I just don't trust NBC with superhero shows. Funny how that works.

Lou said...

I feel I haven't been here in ages and that is most remiss of me. Merry 2011 to you Morgan and all who read here.

And of course more random mentions of Mr Cheekbones always makes me happy.

Morgan Richter said...

Merry 2011 back at you, Lou. Good to see you around these parts. May this new year bring us plenty to discuss about Sendhil and his marvelous cheekbones.