Happy Friday! This will be a super-fast roundup, because I have lots to do today and very little to report. I managed to post a new Duranalysis – “Ordinary World”—on Wednesday; check it out if you haven’t already. In commemoration of this august occasion, here’s Andy (come on, you have to admit that particular lyric is perfect for Andy), which means my series of weird Duran art is now complete. Collect them all!
Book news: My novel Bias Cut is free on Amazon today and all through the weekend. Download it, if you wish; maybe tell a friend about it. It’s a good book. Lots of banter, a bit of a mystery, a handful of glamorous locations, a smidgen of violence. Lots of champagne gets drunk. And there’s only one overt and gratuitous Duran Duran reference in it.
I saw Ghostbusters over the weekend and thought it was adorable. For all the pre-release fuss kicked up about it in various dark corners of the internet, it’s a thoroughly innocuous movie. I can’t picture it changing anyone’s life one way or another (except for maybe Kate McKinnon’s life, because I think this movie just made her a full-fledged star), but I laughed a lot during it. This is the time of year when my standards for movies go way, way down, as I will leap at any excuse to hang out in an air conditioned movie theater for a couple of hours, but I genuinely enjoyed Ghostbusters. Thumbs up.
No new recipes this week. A heat wave has descended upon us. It seems to be descending upon most of the country, so I’m going to try to keep my complaining to a minimum, because a whole lot of us are in the same boat. Point being, though, I haven’t done a whole lot of cooking lately. We’re still eating nothing but salads, interspersed with bowls of cold cereal. I don’t even have any new summer cocktails to report. We’ve been sticking ice cubes in red wine and pretending it’s sangria.
Here are some adorable ducklings and their mother in Morningside Park in Harlem this morning. Morningside Park, by the way, was used in Duran Duran’s “Do You Believe In Shame?” video—it’s the place where the young girl on crutches hops up the stone stairs.
Eighties song lyric showdown! Today’s theme: all those faintly paranoid and overly-sensitive dudes of the eighties. First up: Huey Lewis and the News with “If This Is It”. It’s a semi-terrible song, but the lyrics are kind of wonderful, just because the narrator keeps trying to goad his girlfriend into admitting that the relationship is falling apart, and she keeps refusing to take the bait: “Now you’re pretending that it’s not ending/You’ll say anything to avoid a fight…”, followed by “Girl, don't lie and tell me that you need me/ Girl, don't cry and tell me nothing's wrong/ I'll be all right one way or another /So let me go, or make me want to stay…” Okay, Huey, ever consider that, from her perspective, nothing’s wrong with your relationship, apart from your nonstop passive-aggressive need for validation? It’s clear you’re the one with big problems with the way things are going between you, so maybe stop placing all the responsibility to make things right on her (“So let me go, or make me want to stay”???) and start making some decisions for yourself: Do you want to stay, or do you want to go?
Next: Genesis’ “That’s All”: As with “If This Is It”, this is a nonstop litany of maddeningly unspecific grievances against the narrator’s romantic interest (“I could say day, and you’d say night”, and “taking it all instead of taking one bite”, and “Turning me on, turning me off/Making me feel like I want too much/Living with you is putting me through it, all of the time…”), summed up with that deliriously passive-aggressive hook: “It’s always the same, it’s just a shame, that’s all.” Again, dude: Stay or go. Be open with your girlfriend about the problems you’re having with her instead of ranting at her in veiled terms (I’m assuming “taking it all instead of taking one bite” is meant metaphorically, right? Here’s a useful tip: metaphors have no place in an argument. Specificity is key), and if you can’t work things out, part ways. You’re transparently picking a fight while simultaneously trying to seem like you’re being very mild and reasonable (“It’s just a shame, that’s all”), just so you can feel vindicated if she gets fed up and erupts at you.
That’s all I’ve got. Enjoy the weekend, stay in the shade, wear sunscreen, drink plenty of fluids.