Fun With Keywords: Thanksgiving 2014

Happy Thanksgiving, fellow Americanos! 

Just so you all know, all six of my books—Bias Cut, Lonely Satellite, Demon City, Wrong City, Charlotte Dent, and Preppies of the Apocalypse—are now available in snazzy paperback editions as well as ebook format. Just in time for Christmas! If anybody’s interested in signed copies (perfect for gifting!), email me and we’ll work it out. Otherwise, here's my Amazon author page.

Here are some of the search terms people have used to find this site over the past six months:

duranalysis home
This site is your Duranalysis home base. Click here for the full array of my Duranalyses.

teen wolf it's like you're turning sixteen and
Ohhhh, yes, that’s one of Jackson’s many fine, fine moments on Teen Wolf (it’s in the season one episode “Co-Captains”), when he gives that awesomely bitchy speech to Scott about how Scott is a pitiful excuse for a werewolf: “It’s like you’ve turned sixteen and someone started you out with a Porsche when they should have bought you a nice little Honda. Me? I drive a Porsche.” I can’t find the speech online by itself, but it’s tacked on at the very end of this excellent fan video (scored to The Killers’ “Andy, You’re a Star”, which, you have to admit, makes a pitch-perfect theme song for Jackson). The video is filled with many of Jackson’s finest/ weirdest/ cruelest/ drunkest/ nakedest moments. I know I’m a bit of a Jackson obsessive, but damn, that character (and Colton Haynes’s performance) was brilliant.

arrow felicity kidnapped
Too often.

gi joe baroness bikini
Amazing, right? I love the baroness. She always made evil look so glamorous and fun.

arrow girl wednesday meaning
Ah, this bit of offensive awfulness. I’ll start at the very beginning: The term “Girl Friday” originates from Daniel Defoe’s 1719 novel Robinson Crusoe, which featured a male character named Friday who was Crusoe’s loyal helper. From this, the phrase “Man Friday” became shorthand for any male personal assistant. In 1940, the film His Girl Friday popularized “Girl Friday” to refer to a secretary or female aide. It is no longer 1940, and that phrase is now widely viewed as outdated and offensive.

…but no one told that to Arrow’s Oliver Queen (or, for that matter, to the Arrow staff writers), who, in the second-season episode “Identity”, revealed himself to be: a) a casual misogynist, and b) a dumb bunny when he told super-brainy MIT grad Felicity he was transferring her from the IT department and forcing her to be his coffee-fetching personal assistant (a job she did not want, nor was qualified for), because he wanted, ahem, a Girl Wednesday. Oliver sucks.

did isaac dance with Jackson
isaac x jackson
Yeah, I don’t know if you can really say they “danced”, but in season two of Teen Wolf (“Raving”), Isaac and Jackson did some nuzzling and grinding on the dance floor during a rave. Then Isaac jammed a syringe in Jackson’s neck and knocked him out, and Jackson broke Isaac’s arm while he was still drugged and unconscious, and their sexy shenanigans came to a violent end. But it was nice while it lasted. Teen Wolf is often pretty crappy, but man, back in those early seasons, it could be glorious.

does ioan gruffud really have an accent
Yes, though it’s not the English accent he’s using on ABC’s Forever (nor is it the endearingly weird American accent he used back in Fantastic Four). Ioan Gruffudd is Welsh, and has the lovely lilting tones (and the unpronounceable name) to prove it.

laurel lance nothing a few self-defense classes couldn't handle quote
That was in the Arrow season two season premiere. I like Laurel, mostly, but that was a bad moment for her: Masked gunmen had just burst into a big gala and murdered Starling City’s mayor in front of her, and the only reason she didn’t take a bullet to the head was because a gun jammed, and then a few minutes later she’s being all flippant and smug to Oliver about how bad-ass she was. She is not the most consistent character, on a show full of deeply inconsistent characterizations. 

paul popowich
True story: A decade ago, one of my friends was casually dating Paul Popowich. I told her I was duly impressed, as I’d been a fan of his ever since he played Joe Hardy on some odd short-lived mid-nineties Canadian TV version of The Hardy Boys. Anyway, I was at a party thrown by this friend, and Paul was supposed to show up, but it was growing late and the person I’d arrived with wanted to leave. My friend insisted I wait a little longer: She’d told Paul I was a fan, and he’d specifically said he wanted to meet me. I was mortified by this and really wanted to leave, but she begged me to stay: “He doesn’t have that many fans!”

nick rhodes andy taylor
A thirty-year bond characterized by deep mutual respect between two hardworking music professionals… ha ha, no, these days Nick and Andy seem to pretty much fucking despise each other.

personal life of nick rhodes
Well, for starters, he’s been known to wear fangs in bed. I’m going to quote from my Duranalysis of Arcadia’s video for “The Flame”: It’s deeply strange, but for all I know, this might be a typical evening’s entertainment at Casa Rhodes. Look, everything I’ve ever heard about Nick suggests he’s both glamorous and weird, and that’s how I prefer it. If it turns out he spends most of his evenings playing computer solitaire and microwaving Lean Cuisine entrees, I don’t ever want to hear about it.

who plays griffin childhood friend in rollerboys
Chris Collett plays Gary Lee in Prayer of the Rollerboys, and he’s pretty great in this underrated film. 

awesome spokane

why does jai wilcox on covert affairs always wears purple?
Because Sendhil Ramamurthy looks damn fine in purple. Actually, Sendhil looks damn fine in any color, and I never especially noticed Jai wearing purple on Covert Affairs. Maybe the occasional tasteful purple necktie?

why isnt john taylor in the arcadia videos
Because John Taylor wasn’t in Arcadia—of the two Duran Duran side projects, John and Andy were part of Power Station, while Nick, Simon and (sometimes) Roger made up Arcadia. John did, however, make a fun cameo appearance in the aforementioned video for “The Flame”.

duran duran and elephants

Magical and amazing. Nick, honey, put some pants on.


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